Sunday, 18 November 2012


We've had two birthdays this week.

The first was on would have been Karena's birthday, and, as has happened in the past, the build up to the day was worse than the day itself.

I heard from two of Karena's closest friends that they went out for coffee and cake in her honour on the day - a fitting tribute to my lovely wife.

For me, it was more of a "Beam-me-up-Scottie" type of I wrote to her instead....(a bit odd maybe but seemed like an ok thing to do).

Our second birthday was my step-son's my opinion, he's an outstanding young man...and we enjoyed a huge birthday breakfast, lots of presents, take-away food, cake, family movies and sweets !    He got a sword amongst other things ..... it's a fencing epee so not quite as horrific as it sounds perhaps?!  I feel very privileged to be filling the 'Dad' role in his life even though of course I can't ever fill it biologically ! 
One day I will meet Jesus face-to-face myself and I will meet Ellie's Ben too - and I will tell him of all the joy that his son and daughter brought to our combined family.  That will be a good day.

One of the things you realise about this journey is that all birthdays have a measure of pain associated with them.  Because I love him, I feel so sad that my step-son's Dad isn't there for his it is I feel delighted that this young man has been adopted into our family (and me into his), and I can now call him my son. 
My relationship with my step-children is a great reminder to me that as a Christian, I have been personally adopted into God's family - I am now a son of The Father, an heir, chosen by Him and called by name...all made possible because of what Jesus' has done.

Happy Birthday Son!

1 comment:

  1. Thankyou for your honesty. It is so helpful to those of us who negotiate the grief journey.
    We lost our son in a terrible accident 6 years ago, aged 30, alongside our Pastoral minister.
    Our son had been married for 6 years.
    Last weekend we had his widow and her new husband staying with us. He is a lovely Christian guy.
    Accepting changes in family dynamics is something we have to work through. Not easy at times.
    My own blog about Matt written mostly as letters is found at:

    I find it helps.
    God bless you all.